Dear …

Thanks for your mail. This is a difficult for me to say, but I feel I have to be upfront with you. I want to let you know that it is not anything that you said nor have you offended me in any way. In fact, I appreciate your interest in me and perhaps if you were not so far away, we could have an opportunity to get to know each other better.

To be honest with you, I am just not good at long distant relationships. I have tried them before and found that once the two people decide to commit to each other, regardless of the distance between them, the loneliness that then sets in, becomes overwhelming. In fact, they become even lonelier than when they first started because now they can`t even date people. Instead, they are left with relying on email and a telephone voice for companionship, which NEVER replaces human touch. And then they find that all they do is live for those ` few and far between ` moments when they can finally meet one another at the airport for a brief weekend fling. And before they know it, it’s back to the darkness of loneliness again.

The obvious answer to that dilemma would be for one or the other to move to the same city. That sounds good in theory, but reality is, each person generally has planted roots in their respective cities with friends, family, work, etc. and moving is not all that palatable. The risk is usually too great for the uncertainty of relationships.

So having said all that, I hope I haven`t rained on your parade too badly today. I guess I am just a realist, with the experience behind me to qualify me for the realist job. In most cases I do not even respond to initial contacts from people living great distances from me. But every once in a while, I am so intrigued by someone, like yourself, that I can’t resist. I’m sorry about that. It was not my intention to lead you on. Some may think my wishing not to become involved with someone from a great distance is narrow-minded thinking, because `anything is possible.` But, regrettably, reality has taught me different.

I sincerely wish you the best of luck in your search, __(name)__, and I hope the __(guy/girl/man/woman)__ of your dreams is nearby!

Best wishes,